5 Year Story Of A Start-Up (& Ongoing Mum Guilt)

5 Year Story Of A Start-Up (& Ongoing Mum Guilt)

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Five years ago today, I started a business. At the time, my husband and I had just built a house, I had just left my role at SAP and we just welcomed our third baby girl. I was now a business owner with three kids aged three and under. 

Probably not the most obvious time follow my entrepreneurial dream, but the stars aligned so I grabbed the opportunity. After all, my husband held a full-time job, so the risk was worth taking. Little did we know that 6 months after making this decision, his company would close the UK office and make his role redundant. 

Panic doesn’t even begin to describe how I felt that Christmas when we both found ourselves without a regular income for the first time in our 20+ year career. My instant reaction was that one of us needed to find a job but after a while, we started to see the silver lining on a very dark gloomy cloud. 

My husband decided to switch careers completely and train to be a teacher and I stopped panicking and got back to enjoying the adventure.

This week, to celebrate 5 years in business, I'll be publishing 5 blogs on the Tribal Impact website talking about elements of the culture we have built over the years. I've always admired how Buffer are transparent about their culture so decided to the same. Subscribe to our blog if you want to read the stories!

For now, I'm introducing you to four personal lessons I've learned over the last few years in business.

Getting Familiar With 'Firsts'

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I spent the first 6 months of my start-up journey drinking a lot of coffee. I caught up with all the people that, when you’re holding down a corporate job, you’re somehow too busy or too tired to connect with. It was like the real-world version of Friends Reunited – remember that? 

Often, I’d be in London in the morning and home for cuddles in the afternoon (RIGHT).

What I remember most was that approached these conversations with no agenda, expectation or sales pitch. I felt free and full of adventure

It was just so lovely to listen, laugh and catch up that I’d almost forgotten that I needed to earn a living!

But the balance hasn’t always been easy. There’s no doubt that this has been a roller-coaster adventure full of ‘firsts’ that were scary, unknown and quite frankly, terrifying

  •  First time I wrote a proposal. 
  • First time I went to visit a customer.
  • First time I recorded a professional video in a studio.
  • First time I made a profit (not so scary)
  • First time I had to understand accounting.
  • First time I invested in our eLearning products.
  • First time I invested in technology to support the business. 
  • First time I got paid (an amazing day).
  • First time I sent an invoice (which still hangs on my wall in front of me). 
  • First time I hired an employee (the weight of responsibility feels heavy). 
  • First time I travelled abroad with work.

There are many more…

But start-up life is full of ‘firsts’.  Crikey, life itself is full of ‘firsts’! 

Understanding how to cope with this constant state of uncertainty was non-negotiable.  I decided to do something about it and worked with an executive coach who has supported me ever since.

Balancing My 'Wobble Board'

Over several months my coach and I explored confidence, worry and doubt in great depth. I learned a lot about balancing aspects of my life as if stood on a wobble board. 

My balance wasn’t well managed – some weeks I’d be so entrenched in work that I had no time left for friends or I worry too much about finance that I forgot to have fun.

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Understanding the aspects of life which I found most important and making sure I balanced my time between them was a huge eye opener for me. 

But my coach took it one step further.

She got me to explore what I had to do to make sure I felt balanced in each area. 

It isn’t’ enough to put “family” on my balance board. I needed to know what it is about spending time with family that makes me feel so balanced. Is it going to the park? Baking cakes together? Is it being properly present without my mobile phone?

Balance comes and goes. Sometimes it all feels perfectly aligned. Other times it feels very unbalanced but the difference is that now I recognise it and know what to do about it.

Getting Comfortable With Feeling Uncomfortable

Just recently, our HR team introduced me to a new model (below). I recognised that for a long time, I lived in the Panic Zone, worrying endlessly about everything. Could I earn enough? What if I didn’t earn enough? What if this doesn’t work out?

It tore me apart and detracted my attention from what I should have focused on – the Stretch Zone. Once I let go of the panic, I started enjoying the uncertainty. I focused on learning – learning from mistakes and learning from those around me.

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I noticed that the experiences that typically panicked me made me feel as if I was standing on the edge of an imaginary cliff. Every time I face up to a ‘first’, I look over the edge wondering whether I’ll fly or free-fall. 

Now Tribal is 5 years old, it feels like the cliffs are much higher. But there's a big difference. I have a trusted tribe around me - they’re packing my parachute and holding out a huge safety net below. 

It feels so good to share the adventure with others

Juggling Mum Guilt - It Doesn't Get Easier!

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There’s no doubt that the last few years of my life at Tribal have been the most educational and exhilarating years of my career. I wouldn't change it. Every day I learn something new and feel the buzz (even now!)

But as my youngest turned 5 just a couple of months ago, I experienced a sudden and rather unexpected deep sense of loss. 

A loss which I’m still trying to deal with as I write this post. 

Where did those years go? How did they pass so quickly? 

From a baby in arms to a young schoolgirl – five years looks like a lot of time when you see how a little person has grown up. I’m suddenly wondering how quickly we got to this place and how much I want life to slow down.

The recent lockdown has meant that our lives have been turned upside down. Tribal got very busy at a time when the kids were home with us full-time. 

It sounds like bliss but juggling work, home-schooling, health and life in general has been a struggle. Our familiar daily boundaries were broken. School-pickup didn’t stop my working day. I sometimes find myself working from 8am to 8pm and because I love what I do, I can’t stop!

I feel like I’ve isolated myself to the smallest room in the house with the kid’s noses pressed up against the window looking in and wondering “why is mummy always working?”

The guilt is real. It’s always been there. More so now we’re in the middle of a pandemic and the family/work divide has blurred beyond all recognition. 

So, I’m reflecting on what I can do differently. The kids will soon be back in school so I’m waiting to see how that might adjust routines once again. 

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So, there you have it. Five years condensed into a few paragraphs and probably the most raw and honest blog I've written to date.

My coach challenged me to write this but I decided to publish it. I hope it may inspire others to take the leap and start their business but also open up an honest conversation around the pressure (especially recently) surrounding working parents.

Finally, I wanted to say thank you. I don't mean this to sound like an Academy Award speech but I need to document my gratitude on this milestone so I can look back and remember:

🙏 Thank you to our incredible team - you make every day fun and enjoyable. Without you we wouldn't have delighted customers.

🙏 Big thank you to our wonderful customers. I can't count how many times I've said to my team "we have such lovely customers - we're so lucky!". You treat us like an extension of your team and we love that.

🙏 Thank you to my coach, Romy - our regular conversations help put things into perspective and provides guidance at every challenge I face.

🙏 Thank you to my mentor, Dave, for always being at the end of the phone when I need business advice or a reality check.

🙏 Finally, thank you to my family - my husband for always believing in me and my kids for understanding why mummy works (and my new logo - below 😁).

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Becky Graebe

Stirring employee conversations and connections at SAS

3y

“Balance comes and goes...now I recognise it and know what to do about it.” If there’s more to life, family, career, I don’t know what it would be. Congrats on five amazing years, Sarah! So glad to have connected with you and all that great energy!

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Bernadette Fitton

Senior Global Marketer @ Ivalua | Demand Generation, SaaS

3y

Well done Sarah Goodall your children should be so proud of what you have built - you have broken the mold for working mums!

Nicholas Buck

VP, Principal Analyst & Executive Partner at Forrester | Co-Founder of the VWM Families Foundation

3y

Congratulations Sarah!

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Kevin Kirby

B2B Marketer. Helping the people in businesses connect better with people in other businesses.

3y

Congratulations, Sarah! 🙌 Respect!

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Schalk Viljoen

Digital Marketing Strategist

3y

So happy for you!!

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